Sunday, December 30, 2012

American Football >>> Troll Style


I don’t know what it’s like where you live, but it’s sunny and breezy here today. Sounds nice, right? Well, I would add it is really beautiful watching the ice crystals float by, glittering like diamonds. Still, I’m not rushing outside to catch a few on my tongue. It’s 10 degrees Fahrenheit with a wind chill of 8. For those of you closer to the equator, that’s bone chilling.

Today is also a big day in Wisconsin. The Green Bay Packers meet the Minnesota Vikings for an always interesting Football game. Most of my readers are Americans, and therefore understand the game, but some of you are in other countries. Let me try to put this into perspective.

Wisconsin and Minnesota share a long border primarily defined by the Mississippi river, America’s longest.  This rivalry began in 1961. The Packers have been around far longer than the upstart Vikings so while long, this matchup is newer than others. Green Bay and Minnesota are in the same conference so they meet at least two times per season. Green Bay holds the record for most Superbowl wins, while the Vikings have never won the big game. Sounds like an easy win for the Packers, doesn’t it? Well, on paper yes, but there’s nothing like a rivalry to bring the unexpected to the game.

The Packers play outdoors at the beloved Lambeau Field. The Minnesota Vikings play in a dome, hiding from the cold. Both locations are cold, but Green Bay has the added element of playing along the shore of Lake Michigan. Brrrrr. Today the game will be inside at the Metrodome in Minneapolis.

Enough background, I was telling Oton about this the other day. He was so excited when I mentioned the Vikings, it bordered on insanity.

“Vikings, they’re here?” He asked.

I immediately understood my error. “Well, sort of; these Vikings wear purple and run around chasing a pointy ball,” I said trying to set the football players apart for the Vikings of history.

He rubbed his nose and squinted at me. “They wear purple, the purple of kings?”

Oh geez, what had I done? He was so excited I had to try to explain, but how?  “Oton, would you like to come over to my house and see the Vikings?” I asked with more than a little hesitation.

“Pod, Twig, Uredd, go get Folger. We’re going to see the Vikings!” He screamed.

“Wait, wait, you understand the Vikings won’t actually be at my house, right?”

A blank stare froze his face. Crap, now I had to try to explain television to a troll.

“Okay,” I said, “I’ll come and pick you up when it’s time to see the Vikings, but you have to promise to behave.” I walked away with hideous images of the stains they will leave in my new car.

I left them there, frolicking around like puppies. I couldn’t back out now. I just hope my husband understands.  Now does anyone know what snacks to fix for a troll football party? Anybody?
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